I’m not psychotic, at least I don’t think so and no one has suggested such recently.
The responses from my last blog, “why do people blog”, has started my wheels turning regarding the nature of the relationships that develop on line (and quite frankly, I didn’t want to title my article something about internet relationships because I could feel everyone yawning).
Ever since I first felt the “internet pull”, the emotional attraction, towards someone I didn’t know-------- (another short digression–this was probably 10 years ago during a visit to a chat room–it was the first time I had ever wandered, or crawled at that time, around the internet. I happened into a short conversation that included someone saying something complimentary to me. Now I wouldn’t consider myself a particularly needy person, so I was shocked at the amount of reciprocal emotion that welled up within me. As I tend to do with most threats to my person and family, I separated myself from the source of this seemingly rogue emotion and stopped doing chat rooms)-------- I have had a negative view toward internet relationships.
As I read through the blogs and replies, I occasionally hear people say that these are not real relationships, or that they are 2 dimensional, or some other reference to the incompleteness of the relationship. It is certainly true that elements of a face to face relationship are missing, however, could it be the case that people are sharing more honestly and openly about their inner thoughts and lives than they would even share with those they are next to? If that’s the case, are the relationships more real, or less real?
You can tell a lot about people by how they look and how they behave----or can you? How many times have you had the experience while you’re talking to a person for the first time in depth, that you have known by name for awhile, “this person is totally different than I thought”. Actually, this works in reverse, too. You begin to form a picture in your mind about what people look like and act like just by hearing their thoughts that they write online. A case in point, what do you think of when you think of Sir Peter Maxwell? Now I understand that there was a point that you all posted pictures of yourselves, which is a cool idea, but short of that, do you see what I mean?
I suppose what I’m really saying is that there are some “unreal” aspects to communicating online, but there are also “unreal” aspects to communicating in person. I’m starting to value seeing the real part online unhindered by my judgmental preconceptions and stereotypes that would be rushing in if I were seeing you all in person.
No offense intended Sir Peter.